Monday, 24 December 2012

A Big Thank You and a Merry Christmas!

A BIG THANK YOU TO EVERYONE WHO HAS BOUGHT OUR BOOKS IN 2012!

We really appreciate your support, and hope you have a cracking Christmas and a splendiferous New Year!

All the best from me, Gerald Hawksley

(and me, Otto Fishblanket!)


Wednesday, 19 December 2012

I'll take my curate's egg back!

Well, what do you know?
(Fishblanket poking his ugly mug in again, here)
Stinky Santa is back up to Number 5 in Kindle Store > Books > Fiction > Children's Fiction > Literature > Humourous on Amazon.co.uk!

I'll get them to put the goldplating back on the Rolls.

This turning out to be a rollercoaster ride! A goldplated rollercoaster ride!

Who'd have thought that I would be such an outstanding success as an author!

I have sold 154 books since publication at the start of December on Amazon.co.uk! That is £40.04, if my calculations are correct. I wouldn't have believed it if you had said that I could earn that much from my literary efforts. I am astounded! It is a shame it will all end come December 25th. But in the meantime I can bask in the glorious knowledge that I am a Number 5 (in my category on amazon.co.uk) bestselling author.

I'd better get on with my chickens book pronto!

Cluck, cluck
Otto

Otto Fishblanket's Secret Wife, and a Curate's Egg

Fishblanket reporting back!

The Hobbit film was ok. Lots of ugly creatures and lots of noisy fighting.

My Stinky Santa free promotional giveaway day was a bit of a Curate's Egg .
I have gained more five star reviews (in the USA - eight 5 star reviews now!)  but I have  
(obviously, I suppose, as I have had a day with no sales) slid down the bestseller charts.

From a high of Number 5 before I started free day down to Number 17 (in children's fiction literature humourous, UK).

So hopes of buying Mrs Fishblanket a Christmas present are fading fast, and I have asked for the goldplating to be removed from my Rolls Royce (I can always get it goldplated again later, if my fortunes improve).

(I didn't know there was a Mrs Fishblanket - GH)

Not many people do.

(But she doesn't live with us in the castle - GH)

Aah! Doesn't she?

(You mean you have a secret wife stowed away in the castle? - GH)

Anyway. I digress. I need more people to buy my Stinky Santa book. Preferably before Christmas.

Au revoir,
Otto

Oh, PS. I had written my new book about chickens. But it wasn't good enough, so I have torn it up and started again. My muse visited me last night with a new chicken book idea, anyway. I usually wake up about 3 a.m. worrying about stuff, and that's, coincidentally, when my muse pops into my head.





Sunday, 16 December 2012

FREE CHRISTMAS EBOOK FOR KIDS FROM OTTO FISHBLANKET!

Well. Another day, another update from Otto Fishblanket's publishing empire!
I have again exceeded my own expectations. I am now having my Rolls Royce goldplated.
Stinky Santa has sailed past the 100 sold mark on amazon.co.uk, and I am sitting on a great big pile of stinky cash! (£29.90, if you really want to know)

To celebrate this milestone in my self-publishing success, I will be offering an early Christmas gift!
Tomorrow, Monday 17th December, for one day only, Stinky Santa will be free!
Grab it while you can! (Unless you have already bought it - in which case, persuade someone else to grab it!)
Save 77p (or 99 cents)! It won't be offered for free again until next Christmas!

No news on my chickens book yet. I am awaiting a visitation from my Muse. That is how it works. I am merely a conduit.

There will be no update from me tomorrow, as I am going to the cinema with Mousington and Lord Treacle to see the new Hobbit film.

Bye,
Fishblanket

Click on the cover to be whisked off to Stinky Santa's home on Amazon.com!

Six 5 star reviews so far on Amazon.com! (Plus two 4 star and one 1 star)

Three 5 star reviews on Amazon.co.uk!



Free |Christmas ebook for kids
Stinky Santa Christmas ebook for kids! 


CLICK HERE TO VIEW ON AMAZON.COM
CLICK HERE TO VIEW ON AMAZON.CO.UK

Saturday, 15 December 2012

Otto Fishblanket's bestselling ebook update

Hello
Fishblanket again!

Well, after a little wobble I am going from strength to strength!
Hopefully this will give some inspiration to struggling poets and artists out there. (Well, struggling poets, anyway.)

I am (or rather Stinky Santa is) number 6 in the category thingummyjig > wotsit > and the rest > humourous on Amazon.co.uk.

And I am rapidly approaching a self-publishing milestone. Yes, I have sold 94 books so far this month!!!! Nearly 100!!!!!

That is £24.44 in cold hard cash!!!!

So help me out, I just need to sell another 6 books to reach 100! Then perhaps Amazon will send me a certificate or something.

Don't worry - I shall keep updating you on my bestseller progress right up to Christmas day!

****NEWSFLASH****

I have decided, after much soul searching and many sleepless nights, that my next book will be about CHICKENS.

****END OF NEWSFLASH****

Cheerio,
Otto

PS. And a big thank you to whomsoever bought my book.
PPS. And a big thank you to those who bought stuff from Amazon.com after clicking any of the Amazon links on this blog. (If you are thinking of buying anything whatsoever from Amazon, if you visit Amazon via the links on this blog and then purchase something within 24 hours, Gerald Hawksley gets a small percentage of the final price because he is an Amazon affiliate! At no cost to you! No obligation, of course.)

Perhaps you would like to treat yourself or a loved one to this, perhaps:
 6.15 CT Fancy Yellow and Pink Diamond Diamond Ring (FYCU 4.02ct, RD 0.67ct, Pink 0.57ct, FYRD 0.89ct)
Or maybe this. Mind you there is only one left in stock at the moment, so you had better hurry: Cyclone 4006 - Ultra High Pressure Hard Surface Cleaner, 40,000 psi water with Full Recovery

Friday, 14 December 2012

Inspirational Christmas ebook self-publishing bestseller update

Hello, Fishblanket here, with latest update!

Well,  Stinky Santa is still Number 7 in humourous children's literature bestseller list on Amazon.co.uk!

Have now sold 74 copies this month!!!

That means £19.24 in my pocket!!!

Am wondering whether to up my price from 77 pence to 99 pence. But perhaps that is being too greedy.

But looks like I am going to beat my target!!! I may upgrade my target to £2 a day!

Perhaps a bit ambitious. Maybe £1.50 a day. That would mean £37.50 by December 25th!!
It gives me goosebumps even thinking about it!!!

That would mean I could buy Mrs Fishblanket a Christmas present!!

Inspirational, indeed!

Here is  a picture from Stinky Santa!

Bye,
Fishblanket


Illustration of Santa Claus with his pets
Hello from Stinky Santa!

Thursday, 13 December 2012

Aaargh! Fishblanket wails and gnashes teeth!

Well. Fishblanket here with latest bestsellerdom update, as promised.
I have dropped out of the top 100 children's ebooks on amazon.co.uk. That was short lived. Grrrr!

But I am number 7 in Kindle Store > blah > blah > etc> humourous.

Have now sold 66 copies, though. which equals £17.16. Hoorah, anyway!

That means so far I am meeting my target of £1 per day sales!!!

Brilliant!

Bye,
Fishblanket

PS. More updates to come (hopefully).

Wednesday, 12 December 2012

My inspiring self-publishing success story by Otto Fishblnaket

Phew!
What a day!
Stinky Santa is now Number 85 out of all children's ebooks on Amazon.co.uk!

What will tomorrow bring?

For inspiration, I shall let you into some of the mindboggling numbers involved. It certainly beats working for a living!

As of this moment, since publication on December 1st, Stinky Santa has sold 46 copies on Amazon.co.uk!

That means, as my royalty on each book sold is 26 pence, so far this month I have cleared £11.96!

My target for December 25th is to make £25, or £1 a day. So spread the word, and help me out, won't you?

What happens after December 25th, I don't know. Probably not much demand for a Christmas book. I shall have to write another book. Perhaps a Valentine's Day title?

I will update you on my progress.

If you are wondering what has happened to Gerald Hawksley, he is eating biscuits and sulking. Jealous of my success, I suppose.

Toodle-pip,
Otto

Update: have now overtaken Walliams in UK bestseller chart!

Hello.
Fishblanket here!
Here is an update on my previous post.
I'm ordering my Rolls Royce now!
Bye,
Fishblanket

PS. I bet Walliams is gutted, because my book hasn't got many words in it, and his has got tons. And he paid for a proper illustrator, too, so his book hasn't got rubbish illustrations either. Tee hee!

Screenshot of my incredible bestselling success
I am a genius bestselling author, so there!

I create a stink with David Walliams!

Hello!
Fishblanket here!
Just to share my mad, crazy as stinky stinkpants news! What a giddy life I am now leading. I don't know why I didn't think of becoming an author before!

My authorial debut Stinky Santa is racing up the charts like nobody's business. If you go to Amazon.co.uk and find your way to  Kindle Store > Books > Fiction > Children's Fiction > Literature > Humourous you will see! I am now cuddling up to David Walliams in the UK bestsellers chart! See the screenshot below!

I know! I can't believe it either!

I have now made a whole £8 from UK sales! Goodness knows what that Walliams chap must be raking in! I would have thought he would have made at least  £20 by now, if not more!

screenshot of stinky santa's stinking success
Look at me! I'm a bestselling author!


Saturday, 8 December 2012

Gerald Hawksley interviews Otto Fishblanket

Here is an interview with Otto Fishblanket, author of Stinky Santa.

Gerald Hawksley (me):  Hello, Otto.

Otto: Hello.

GH: How are you today?

Otto: Very well, thank you for asking.

GH: I see your Stinky Santa book is doing very well. A lot of people are downloading it for free.

Otto: Yes. I must say I am pleased and surprised at the number of people that are downloading my book for free. I have had some nice reviews.

GH: And you had a one star review, too. They said they didn't like it that you were mean about Santa.

Otto: Yes. Although I did not mean to court controversy.

GH: What is your favourite sort of cake?

Otto: My favourite cake is Battenberg.

GH: Oh. I find that a bit sickly. I am not that fond of marzipan. I am partial to a nice Victoria sponge.

Otto: I know. A bit too partial, if you ask me.

GH: What is it like being a famous author? Are you going to give up your part-time cheese-mongering business?

Otto: I think the cheese-mongering can be put on the back-burner for the time being.

GH: Are you going to write any more books?

Otto: I am going to write 50 more books next year.

GH: That is a lot of books.

Otto: I am very talented.

GH: Can I illustrate them? If I give you some Battenberg cakes?

Otto: I'll think about it.

GH: I rode a bicycle once. Have you ever done anything exciting?

Otto: My whole life has been a rollercoaster of thrills and derring-do.

GH: What can you see out of your window?

Otto: I can see a field with cows in it.

GH: Do you like trains?

Otto: I once lived on a train for a whole year.

GH: But now you live in a castle?

Otto: Yes.

GH: With me and Mousington and Lord Treacle.

Otto: Yes. You can see the field with cows in it, too.

GH: Yes.

Otto: Shall we go and have some cake?

GH: Yes. Thank you for the interview. It was very informative. I'm sure your fans will appreciate it.

Otto: I'm sure they will.

GH: Cake.

Otto: Yes.

Thursday, 6 December 2012

Stinky Santa Christmas ebook free again!!

Otto here!
Well, thank you everyone what bought my book!
I hope you enjoyed it! I will write more soon!

I have to put it free again now, because that is what authors do nowadays.
Amazon has somewhat changed the landscape as far as us self-publishing types are concerned.
I am still trying to work it out, but I think I have grasped what they are up to, particularly as far as children's ebooks are concerned.

In the meantime, here is another picture from Stinky Santa, and the book is free tomorrow and Saturday, the 7th and 8th of December!

Illustration of Santa Claus in bed
Stinky Santa in bed with his stinky dog and his stinky cat

CLICK HERE TO VIEW ON AMAZON.COM
CLICK HERE TO VIEW ON AMAZON.CO.UK

Wednesday, 5 December 2012

Here is stinky Santa's cat

Here is stinky Santa's cat, Tiddles

Illustration of stinky Santa's stinky cat, Tiddles
Stinky Santa's cat, Tiddles
The worst thing about Tiddles, I think,
is when Tiddles widdles in the sink.

Here is stinky Santa's dog

Here is a picture of stinky Santa's dog.
A picture of Santa's dog from Stinky Santa's Christmas ebook
Stinky Santa's stinky dog

He has been out in the rain, so he is extra stinky.

Monday, 3 December 2012

Stinky Santa wants a word with you

I am Stinky Santa
I stink like mouldy cheese
I have a smelly beard
And spots upon my knees

illustration from Stinky Santa, a Christmas ebook for kids
Hello, I am Stinky Santa!
Stinky Santa, a very smelly Christmas ebook for children. Only 99 cents!!!

CLICK HERE TO VIEW ON AMAZON.COM
CLICK HERE TO VIEW ON AMAZON.CO.UK

Saturday, 1 December 2012

Stinky Santa has a bath!

Otto Fishblanket here again!

Here is another "illustration" from my new Christmas book!

It's a fine life being an author, I have decided.
Obviously I don't need the money or the fame, as I have both of those in abundance already.
It is more the satisfaction of knowing millions of people will be reading my books, and having their lives made the better for it.

Merry Christmas! And do download my book while it is free.
When it has finished being free it will only cost you 99 cents anyway, and if I you purchase enough of them I might even buy Hawksley a mince pie for his efforts at illustrating it. Seasonal spirit, and all that.

Anyway, as promised here is the picture of Santa in the bath:

Illustration of Santa in the bath
Stinky Santa in the bath

Friday, 30 November 2012

Free Christmas ebook for kids!

Hello, Fishblanket again!
I've got my book published! I am an author!

And what is more it is free on December 1st and 2nd! Thereafter it is only 99 cents!

I am so proud of myself for writing it, even though it hasn't got many words and the pictures are rubbish.

I might write another book soon with more words and some decent pictures.

Here is the cover. If you click on it it will take you to the product page on Amazon.


Cover illustration for christmas ebook by Otto fishblanket


CLICK HERE TO VIEW ON AMAZON.COM
CLICK HERE TO VIEW ON AMAZON.CO.UK

I'M NOT PAYING GERALD HAWKSLEY FOR HIS RUBBISH ILLUSTRATIONS

Well, it looks like Mr Hawksley escaped from the castle basement, where he has been banished to by Amazon, and sneaked in here and put the prices up again. Deluded fool!

But he has been doing illustrations for my new Christmas ebook.
I instructed him to try and do pictures that are like the old engravings you see in classic Christmas books (like in those old books by that chap Dickens).
As you can see, he failed miserably.

I am, of course, refusing to pay him. Not that I could afford to, anyway, as I am only charging 99 cents for my books.

I'll put up a link for my new Christmas ebook when Amazon get round to putting it on their site. Don't hold your breath, though, as they seem to be preoccupied with More Important Things.

Here is one of the illustrations:

Christmas reindeer eating pickled eggs
Reindeer on Santa's couch eating pickled eggs

Regards,
OTTO FISHBLANKET

(By the way, if any of you good folk are considering Christmas purchases from Amazon.com, if you do so via the Amazon links on this blog a small percentage of the purchase price will go to Mr Hawksley, at no cost to you. There is no incentive for you to do this.)

Friday, 23 November 2012

Otto Fishblanket's Summer Sale

Hello, all!
Otto Fishblanket here! I am running the show from now on. Gerald Hawksley has gone for a little, ahem, break. Don't expect him back anytime soon.

First off, I am having a summer sale of Mr Hawksley's ebooks. I am in the process of reducing them all to 99 cents. As no-one is buying his pathetic rubbish any way I don't expect this to make much difference.

Into the bargain bin they go.

I am going to publish my own ebook, and it will be better than his and only cost 99 cents to start with. I have to get him to illustrate it, though, unfortunately, as I cannot afford a proper illustrator.

Goodness knows what rubbish he will come up with.

By the way, if any of you good folk are considering Christmas purchases from Amazon.com, if you do so via the Amazon links on this blog a small percentage of the purchase price will go to Mr Hawksley, at no cost to you. There is no incentive for you to do this.

He is a decent enough chap, really. He just doesn't apparently have any semblance of a grip on reality.


Thursday, 22 November 2012

Well that seemed to do the trick! Or did it?

Things get odder and odder.
I thought I would head over to Author Central and check out my author rank, just to depress myself further. Oh, how cruel they are! This is what I saw:


Considering I have sold about three books today I am beginning to think either I am going insane, or amazon is.
Perhaps we both are.
Perhaps it's the Fishblanket effect.

Update: It was mocking me after all. I checked again and the graph has reverted back to it's normal sad downward trajectory.
Over to you, Fishblanket.

Handing over the reins to Fishblanket

It seems amazon.com has removed half of my kindle books from the categories they were put in and dumped them category-less in the cold wasteland of general kindle books. The rest of my kindle books have practically stopped selling now, any way.

I am putting Jake Bakes Cakes out for free tomorrow and Saturday. I've really no idea why, as my Happy Hat Day book was stripped of it's categories on the last day of it's free promotion, therefore rendering the promotion a complete waste of time.

So here is my plan of action:
I am going to halt progress on my new titles and hand over the reins to Otto Fishblanket, and see if he can do any better. He is quite keen, and says he has an idea for a Christmas ebook. Well, he'll have to get a move on, especially as he wants me to illustrate it, and I am very slow (even more so now as we can't afford to put the heating on).

Oh, and says he will price it at 99 cents, and perhaps if I reduced my prices to a sensible price like that I might actually sell some books.

I don't know how proper publishers make any money, I really don't.

Anyway, I am off to https://www.gov.uk/jobs-jobsearch now.

Toodle-pip

Saturday, 10 November 2012

Happy Hat Day - free ebook

Hello everyone!
Happy Hat Day will be free on Amazon from Monday for five days!
(Hopefully note of desperation not too apparent.)
Hoorah!
I am working on more children's rhyming picture books for the kindle, and hope to have more titles available soon!
Thank you to everyone who has bought my books. It has been a great year, but I don't know what next year will bring.

There has been a lot of talk about diminishing sales on Amazon, and whether it is a glitch, or even whether the ebook boom is coming to an end. I know my expectations have somewhat diminished, and it doesn't look, at the moment, as if I can make more than a part-time income out of this.

But I will keep making my odd little ebooks for the time being and hopefully enough of you will keep buying them to keep my cake cupboard stocked. And that's amazing enough! Who would have thought my scribblings would keep me supplied with cake for the whole year! Bonkers!




Tuesday, 23 October 2012

Free Silly Monsters again!

A word to the wise:
Silly Monsters ABC ebook is free on Amazon again today, October 23rd, and tomorrow, October 24th.

Sunday, 7 October 2012

Free Ghostie Book!!!

Well, Ghosties was meant to be on offer for free today and tomorrow. So far I have had zero sales, and now I have zero free downloads, as well :(
Oh, well!

UPDATE: Ghosties are in limbo. It seems that Ghosties is not available at the moment due to some sort of glitch at Amazon's Electronic Emporium - a Halloween gremlin, perhaps.

A shame, as it was set for a free promotion today and tomorrow!

UPDATE to the UPDATE: Ghosties has risen from the dead! Seemingly Ghosties is available for purchase now. I'll announce some more Free days when I am sure everything is ticketty-boo.

UPDATED UPDATE:
GHOSTIES WILL BE AVAILABLE TO DOWNLOAD FOR FREE FROM AMAZON ON THURSDAY 11th OCTOBER, AND FRIDAY 12th OCTOBER
Hoorah! (Hopefully)

Illustration of cuddly ghostie hugging bemused person

CLICK HERE TO VIEW SAMPLE ON AMAZON.COM
CLICK HERE TO VIEW SAMPLE ON AMAZON.CO.UK

Wednesday, 3 October 2012

And the ghosties are here! My new Halloween Kindle book!

Halloween is in the air.
You'd like to see a ghost - but where?
At night when the sun's gone down,
Come with me to Ghostie Town . . .
Where you will find the most colorful and cheerful collection of ghosties you could ever hope to meet. 

cover illustration for Ghosties, a Halloween ebook for kids


CLICK HERE TO VIEW SAMPLE ON AMAZON.COM
CLICK HERE TO VIEW SAMPLE ON AMAZON.CO.UK

Tuesday, 2 October 2012

The ghosties are coming!!

Hopefully I'll get this book finished for Halloween!
If not, then there's always  . . . next Halloween!


Saturday, 25 August 2012

Thursday, 16 August 2012

Filing rivets

Hello, everyone!

Fishblanket says never to apologize for anything, and he should know.
Fact is, Lord Treacle has had me locked in the cellar filing rivets.
Sadly, at the moment that is all I am allowed to do.

I have lots of ideas for new ebooks, but unfortunately filing rivets is all I am able to do for the time being.

Be back just as soon as all the rivets have been filed.

Cheerio for now!



Wednesday, 25 July 2012

My next FREE Kindle book for kids is Silly Monsters 1,2,3

Mousington has forgiven me for hiding his jam.

So, what to do to celebrate? Fishblanket has been giving me rides around the walled garden in a wheelbarrow. I have had a large slice of chocolate cake.

And now I am going to give away another free Kindle ebook for kids on amazon. I say "for kids", but really anyone can download it. Why not? It's free!

I generally don't read "grown-up" books myself. They are usually boring.

Here is the book I am giving away, it is a Silly Monsters counting book. It is scheduled to go free on Amazon on Friday 27th July and Saturday 28th July.

Join the freevolution!

Cover of Silly Monsters 1,2,3
Silly Monsters 1,2,3

And here are some pictures from the book:
silly monsters in a tree, illustration from my ebook for kids
Three Silly Monsters in a tree

Illustration of six silly monsters on a train from my ebook for kids
Six Silly Monsters on a train



CLICK HERE TO VIEW SAMPLE ON AMAZON.COM
CLICK HERE TO VIEW SAMPLE ON AMAZON.CO.UK

Sunday, 22 July 2012

Another free ebook for kids from Celebrity Author, Gerald Hawksley!

Just popped in to say that the Kindle version of Don't Juggle Bees is FREE again on Amazon tomorrow (Monday) and Tuesday, the 23rd and 24th of July.
(I have been grounded today by Lord Treacle for hiding Mousington's jam. I protested that I was a Celebrity Author, and that jam-hiding was part and parcel of that role, but he was having none of it.)

Cover illustration for Don't Juggle Bees, A silly rhyming kindle picture book for children by Gerald Hawksley





To see it on Amazon.com click here!

To see it on Amazon.co.uk click here!


FREE offer now expired, but do check back. More books will be offered free every month.


Wednesday, 11 July 2012

Not another free ebook?

"Why are you giving away so many free ebooks?" asked Fishblanket one day.
We were on our way into the village to buy new underpants for Lord Treacle. He has them handmade by the local undies maker (who's also the baker and the undertaker).
He gets through so many because he insists on sliding down the bannisters to breakfast every morning.
"Well," I said, stopping to put the wheelbarrow down for a minute, and wiping my brow, "I suppose it is because I'm not selling many."
"Hmm," said Fishblanket, "You ought to get a proper job."
"I do need new shoes," I said.
"Cheeselamp is looking for an apprentice lard-pit scraper . . ."
"Tempting. But I think I'll stick with the ebooks. Things might look up soon."
"You're a fool," said Fishblanket, "A fool with holes in his shoes."

And so it is, as no-one is buying Happy Hat Day at the moment, I am giving it away for nothing.
It won't get me new shoes, but hopefully it will bring a smile to some small tot's face. And what is that compared to smart footwear?

Note: FREE offer now expired, but do check back. More books will be offered free every month.




Click here to have a peek at it on Amazon.com!

Or click here to see it on Amazon.co.uk!


Illustration from Happy Hat Day a silly rhyming picture ebook
We need new hats, it's clear!

And you know by now, of course, you don't need a Kindle to read Kindle ebooks! You can see them in full glorious color on your iPad, iPhone, Android device, Mac or PC  by getting your FREE Kindle reading app HERE!

Tuesday, 10 July 2012

Free children's ebook - My Little Puppy

Another free kindle ebook for kids!
To celebrate our recent publications Little Star Books are offering a gift to all puppy lovers everywhere (young and old). The My Little Puppy ebook will be free on Saturday 14th July and Sunday 15th July via amazon.com and amazon.co.uk.


Have a look on Amazon.com:
My Little Puppy
Or on Amazon.co.uk:
My Little Puppy

And remember you don't need a Kindle to read Kindle ebooks! You can see them in full glorious color on your iPad, iPhone, Android device, Mac or PC  by getting your FREE Kindle reading app HERE!

Adverts in ebooks. Why I am putting adverts in my ebook.

I think judiciously placed advertisements relevant to the content of the ebook can enhance the reader's experience. Obviously this must be done with taste and flair. Imagine, for instance, if you were reading an ebook about a chocolate factory. When you reached the end, you would probably quite fancy a bit of chocolate. Imagine your surprise and pleasure, therefore, to find placed elegantly before you an opportunity to place an order for, say, Fishblanket's Luxurious Chocolate Fancies! Delivered to your door within an hour by helicopter, and at the cost of a mere one thousand guineas. Would that not be a fitting finale to your reading experience. Who could resist?

In just such a spirit of maximising reader pleasure I have partnered with several esteemed online purveyors of hats, and have added adverts (or hatverts, as I call them) for their wares to the end of my children's ebook Happy Hat Day.

Here they are if you are interested in such things.
(I am quite willing to disclose that I earn one shilling for every one thousand hats sold. Ker-ching!)

Hat advertisement from Happy Hat Day, an illustrated children's ebook

Hat advertisement from Happy Hat Day, an illustrated children's ebook

Hat advertisement from Happy Hat Day, an illustrated children's ebook

Hat advertisement from Happy Hat Day, an illustrated children's ebook

Monday, 9 July 2012

New kid's ebooks published by Little Star Books!

Here are four super ebooks for children, just published by Little Star Books (that's me and Moira Butterfield with help from Maisy Daniels). They are fun little rhymes illustrated with a mixture of photographs and hand drawn illustration. At the end of each book are ten first word flashcards.

cover picture of My Little Puppy, a children's illustrated ebook about puppies cover picture of This Little Kitten, a children's illustrated ebook about kittens
cover picture of My Noisy Farm, a children's illustrated ebook about farm animals cover picture of My Funny Bunny, a children's illustrated ebook about rabbits

Cute, aren't they? Here are some pictures from inside the books:

Picture of a cute baby chick from My Noisy Farm, an illustrated children's ebook

Picture of a sleepy little kitten from This Little Kitten, an illustrated children's ebook

Picture of a sleepy little puppy from My Little Puppy, an illustrated children's ebook

Picture of an alert little rabbit from My Funny Bunny, an illustrated children's ebook
Have a look at them on Amazon.com:
My Little Puppy
This Little Kitten
My Noisy Farm
My Funny Bunny

Or on Amazon.co.uk:
My Little Puppy
This Little Kitten
My Noisy Farm
My Funny Bunny


And you know you don't need a Kindle to read Kindle ebooks? You can see them in full glorious color on your iPad, iPhone, Android device, Mac or PC  by getting your FREE Kindle reading app HERE!

Wednesday, 4 July 2012

Free Cakes For Everyone! (Another free ebook for kids!)

Free Jake Bakes Cakes eBook for everyone, that is! Yes, Jake is baking cakes for everyone for free again! This time he is free to download on Friday 6th July and Saturday 7th July 2012. Remember to get them while they're hot!
FREE offer now expired, but do check back. More books will be offered free every month.

Picture of monkey eating banana cake from Jake Bakes Cakes kid's ebook


CLICK HERE TO VIEW SAMPLE ON AMAZON.COM
CLICK HERE TO VIEW SAMPLE ON AMAZON.CO.UK


And you know you don't need a Kindle to read Kindle ebooks? You can see them in full glorious color on your iPad, iPhone, Android device, Mac or PC  by getting your FREE Kindle reading app HERE!

Also see a list of the top 100 free ebooks for kids by visiting the links in the box on the right hand side of this blog.

Download kid's ebooks for free! View kid's ebooks for free! It's better than free cake! (Almost)

Friday, 29 June 2012

More free ebooks for kids! Get Busy and Happy!

Another giveaway of free ebooks!
If you go here you will be able to download My Happy Book for free on Friday (today) 29th June and Saturday 30th June.

Picture of boy and dog running on beach

And if you go here you will be able to download My Busy Book for free on the 1st and 2nd of July.
Hoorah for free ebooks!
FREE offer now expired, but do check back. More books will be offered free every month.

Sunday, 24 June 2012

Illustration Friday: Space

Picture of Owl and Pussycat riding a space rocket

The Owl and the Pussycat went into space
On a beautiful pea-green rocket.
They took some bees, and a big lump of cheese,
Which Owl kept safe in his pocket.

Thursday, 14 June 2012

Free Busy Kindle Kid's ebook

And another freebie!
Little Star Books is making My Busy Book free for one day on Friday 15th June. So if you missed it last time it was free you can grab it now, if you are quick!
FREE offer now expired, but do check back. More books will be offered free every month.

cover picture for My Busy Book kindle ebook for kids


busy child meeting elephant


busy child cycling through jungle


mouse driving a truck




CLICK HERE TO VIEW SAMPLE ON AMAZON.COM
CLICK HERE TO VIEW SAMPLE ON AMAZON.CO.UK